BOOK REVIEW: The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin

This review is going to focus on The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin. I loaned this book from my local public library back when it came out in December 2017 and I have had a blog post draft sitting in my queue for ages.

This book dives into the question “How do I respond to expectations?” While researching an answer to this question Rubin found that people generally fit into four different groups, which she calls the Four Tendencies (Hello title!): Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels. Throughout the book she describes how one’s tendency influences one’s behavior and helps shed light on how to work around a tendency to be more effective in daily decisions.

The first book I read by Gretchen Rubin was The Happiness Project, and although I loved that book, I think this book is my new favorite by her because it helps me understand myself, and those around me in a different light. I am able to understand to some extent why my husband does things the way he does. I love that this book discusses how to best approach each tendency, and I think by keeping in mind our tendencies a lot of little squabbles can be avoided.

My review may be late to the game on this one, but I think this book needed to be covered. Will you grab a copy of the book and learn more about yourself? I also recommend taking her quiz to find out what tendency you are.

I am an obliger. This means that I respond to outer expectations, but avoid responding to inner expectations. It’s easy for me to respond to what others want me to do, but when I have a goal that I would like to pursue, i.e. go to the gym, it is much easier for me to put that on the back burner when something comes up instead of saying no to the outer expectation. Once I learned more about my tendency, I focused a lot on figuring out how I could learn to say no to outer expectations and reach some of my personal goals. It hasn’t been easy, but progress is better than nothing.

I truly hope you enjoy reading this book. Happy reading 🙂

Own Your Everyday by Jordan Lee Dooley

A huge thank you out to Eidelweiss+ for sending me an ARC!

I really enjoyed reading Own Your Everyday by Jordan Lee Dooley. I liked how she showed her own faults and vulnerabilities in her stories to make a point to her readers about self-care and really just owning your day. It was empowering to slow down and take in her advice in today’s world that is go go go and go up go up go up. It really hit home for me, and she identified several spots where snags would set me back. I like that I can now think about the strategies she suggested to move past those snags. It was a great book and I hope to see more from Dooley in the future!

It has been a few days now since I finished reading Own Your Everyday and sent the above review to Eidelweiss+. Now that I have had more time to reflect on Dooley’s message I feel even more connected to it and it hits home even more. I grew up always having the pressure to do well, and to be better than others at school, sports, and more. When I left school and entered the work force I lost a lot of the regular praise that I had once received. I’ll admit, I still feel lost sometimes because I don’t think I know my true purpose or how to have a better balance in life so that I don’t require constant approval. This book definitely opened up a lot of soul searching I need to do. Maybe it will for you too.

Happy reading 🙂